Change and the Power of "Why

Is it time to make a change? Change what? Change how? Change Why? Change can be a five letter word that makes us cry out a possible host of four letter words. You fill in the blank. Mine would be, "Help!"

As I write today, I'm thinking why in the world am I writing about change? Who am I to write about it? What do I have to say about change that can help others?

On one hand, I love change. I am wired for change when it comes to my work and the world around me. I thrive in environments the are in constant change. I get bored real easy and that could be dangerous.

On the other hand, when it comes to personal change, I really struggle. After all, THE STRUGGLE IS REAL!

Why do we resist the inevitable? Change is the only constant.  Everything alive is changing. Everything dead is changing too. Think about it. I've heard it said that if you are not changing you are dying. The truth is, even when things die, change doesn't stop.

Seconds are changing to minutes. Minutes are changing to hours. Hours are changing to days. Days are changing to weeks. You get the picture. Time is always changing. Once passed, its gone. Time is a most precious commodity.

The older I get the faster it goes by. I'm almost a half century old. I think I like the sound of forty-nine better. Dang, I'm getting old! These days I'm looking back at my life and asking myself some hard questions. Knowing that I'm not promised tomorrow is fueling the "Why" behind the changes I want to make here and now.

Let me ask you a question: "If today was your last day to live how would you spend it? What would you do? Where would you go? With whom would you spend it? What words would you speak? What relationships would you want restored?"

If you answered those questions with absolute honesty,  I'm sure the thought of them  evoked some kind of emotion. This emotion can be the very fuel you need to ignite a passion to change how you approach each twenty-four hours in a day. If the answers to the most significant questions you can ask yourself are compelling enough to create a strong feeling of discontent, leading to an even stronger desire to change; you may have your "WHY".

Our WHY has to be compelling enough that it causes us to endure the agony and pain of change. Change is never easy. It is possible though. Once we have discovered our why of change it will inform the what and how of change.

The power of our WHY should be like the carrot dangling in front of the horse. No matter what the metaphor it has to be in front of us everyday. It has to influence and evoke our passion and motivation. It has to empower us to get up after we fall. It has to draw you back on course when life pulls you away. Change becomes possible when the power of our WHY is greater than anything, or reason to stay the same.

I would love to hear your stories, get your feedback and comments. Subscribe today so you don't miss out on the conversation. Join the community of strugglers. Share and invite others too.

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL

Confession of an Insecure Man - How to Fight Insecurity and Win

Insecurity Confession: I am an insecure man. Just writing that makes my insides tremble because of what you and others might think of me. One thing is for sure; I am sick and tired of allowing my deep seeded insecurities keeping me from living, pursuing, and realizing my dreams.

In this post I will share where I think some of my insecurities come from, how they have impacted my life, and some strategies to fight and win the battle over my struggle with insecurity.

How in the world did I become so insecure?

My story isn't much different than many. I was 5 years old when my Dad left home. I don't remember much, but I do know that it was the event that shattered any sense of security. I remember going to first grade and making myself sick so my mom would have to come get me. I was afraid that my mom would leave me too. I didn't understand why or what happened. There was absolutely no way for me to process the pain of what had happened. Like most kids I probably thought something was wrong with me, or that I had done something wrong.

With age, my insecurities matured and morphed. I was anxious and afraid of nearly everything. I became a pleaser to be accepted and worthy of being liked and loved. I was a class clown and the life of the party. Even with all of my efforts I never felt like that I was good enough or good for much of anything.

I began to believe what I thought about myself, and then began to live it out as a teenager. Drugs, alcohol, pornography, failure, and shame only created a deeper and undeniable wound that only exacerbated and deepened my struggles and insecurities further.

As a young adult, the fear of failure would take a paralyzing grip on my life. This only continued enforcing the belief that I was not good enough and wouldn't succeed at much of anything.
To this day, I have dreams in my heart that I have not pursued because I have believed the lies. I'm. 49 years old and it's far past time for me to grow up. It's time for change.

How has insecurity impacted my life?
That is a deep question. So, the simple answer is that has impacted every area of my life. It caused me to aim small and shoot small so any failure would be survivable. I sought safety, approval, and acceptance above all. Fear of disappointing others and failing have been and still are the greatest insecurities I struggle with today.

How can I win the battle?
I have to honestly accept and love who God created me to be, imperfections and all.
I have to face my fears and refuse to allow them to keep me paralyzed with people pleasing.I have to come to the place that the greater failure would be not stepping out and pursuing the dreams planted inside me. I would rather step out and fail miserably than go to my grave never attempting to do anything. That would be failure. Starting this blog is a first step. There is more to come.

If you can relate, or have a story to tell, I'd love for you to share it. I hope to inspire your inner voice and encourage you to take your next steps to fight insecurity and win. Remember, you are not alone. You don't have to fight alone either.

THE STRUGGLE IS REAL!